San Lucas Light

Corona Light is the Jessica Simpson of the beer world: attractive, tasty, fun to pal around with, and dumb in the best possible way. San Lucas Light, then, is necessarily the Ashlee Simpson of beers: unpleasant, ugly, disgusting, unnecessary, and worthy only of throwing into a dirty dumpster.

Even the buzz is no good. If it's worth it to you to sacrifice your quality of life for the sake of saving a few pesos on a cut-rate alternative, then by all means, go with San Lucas Light, and conscript yourself to an everlasting purgatory of desperate mediocrity. Say hi to Ashlee Simpson for me while you're there … or better yet, smash her fucking face in with the first bottle of San Lucas you finish.

Review by Magic Orlando